Why the hell are things so expensive these days? You know, when I was a boy, everything was cheaper. I guess everything was cheaper because it was shittier. Like old 80s toys. How shit were they? $20 for a plastic action figure that can't do anything and whose battle axe you lose in your backyard on the first day of playing with him? I think not, Mattel. Now you pay $50, but you get a real laser gun that actually cuts through 1 cm of human flesh. And what about clothes? I guess they must have been *really* cheap in the 70s and 80s.

One thing the 80s did good? Cartoons. Where the fuck have all those awesome cartoons gone these days? What ever happened to plain old vanilla Astro Boy? Or Transformers? How about some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Damn, I'll even settle for Samurai Pizza Cats on a decent time slot. I pity the children of today who grow up watching shit like that. How can one expect to get an education from cartoons that lead you to believe small furry animals come out of little balls and fight each other? Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go into the sewer to hunt for the Technodrome from Dimension X.